People Who Need to Go Far, Far Away

Call me cruel, but I’ve long thought that PETA were a bunch of idiots. Any and all doubt has been removed with their recent request of Ben & Jerry’s to replace cow’s milk with human milk in their products.

“The fact that human adults consume huge quantities of dairy products made from milk that was meant for a baby cow just doesn’t make sense,” says PETA Executive Vice President Tracy Reiman. “Everyone knows that ‘the breast is best,’ so Ben & Jerry’s could do consumers and cows a big favor by making the switch to breast milk.”

Turns out, successful business men have a little more common sense than PETA members like Pamela Anderson, Woody Harrelson, and Corey Feldman. Who’d have thought?

“We applaud PETA’s novel approach to bringing attention to an issue, but we believe a mother’s milk is best used for her child,” said a spokesperson for Ben and Jerry’s.

I wish they’d join up with Save the Whales and go freeze their butts off somewhere in the arctic.

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